The Man Book

When I was 15, I was introduced to something that genuinely changed my life.  A friend of mine (well, a few, actually) shared with me how they journaled love letters to their future husbands.  These letters were pretty "raw", sweet, loving and open conversations to these men my friends had never met.  I was immediately interested. 

I bought the cheapest, but biggest journal I could find from Barnes & Noble.  I bought a few stickers, and wrote the most embarrassing, innocent, mushy love letter you will ever read.  I of course had no clue about love, or marriage, or anything and that first letter sure proved it!  I filled the lined page with my neatest handwriting, and covered any blank space with the stickers I bought.  Precious.  My future "first" letters were not much better, quality-wise, but I had to start somewhere! My first letters also mimicked what I'd seen in my friend's notebooks, but it didn't take me long to allow my own creativity flow onto the pages.  I called this journal my MAN BOOK.

"Man-booking" became a life-saver for me by the time I got to college.  I firmly believe that God knows who one person will marry, as opposed to "several options that could be right" as others believe.  I'm not saying that I'm right, I'm just saying this helped with my journaling.  Writing to my future husband, with only him in mind, kept my girlish obnoxiousness in control.  He began to form in my mind, not physically really, but in the understanding that he did exist, and was hopefully waiting for me as well.  I would write almost daily, putting hours of effort and thought into every word I wrote.  Manbooking became a full-fledged, time consuming art project for me! It was calming to think that someone whom I hadn't met was "listening" to the very rawest part of my heart as I shared in detail my most private feelings and thoughts.  I introduced manbooking to my roommates and best friends at college, and we'd have manbooking nights where we decorated the pages and sat sprawled on the floor in silence, falling in love with the man God had for us.

Journaling to my husband brought me closer to the Lord.  I would pray for every detail of my future husband's life: his heart, his relationships, his temptations, his purity, his everything.  I began to experience an openness with the Lord I hadn't felt before...I of course had prayed to God about things that were important to me, but I'm sure any woman would agree that her heart is the most precious, protected thing in her life.  Baring it before the Lord and my man-book journal made me vulnerable and willing for the Lord to work in me and prepare me for this man I waited for.  I journaled throughout my first relationship at school, although not as often, and I know the Lord used it to convict me in how I was handling myself.

I remember the night I met Nick, I wrote to my journal, "I think I finally met you".  I'm glad I was right or I would have had to scratch that out eventually!!  Nick allowed me to read his personal journal early in our relationship so I could know all about him.  There were several times when my journal entries of prayers for my future husband lined up with Nick's prayers for his future wife.  I do not believe this was a coincidence! 
It was so exciting to write "Nick" in the header the night we got engaged as opposed to my normal, "dear future husband" I was used to writing.  I gave Nick the first of FOUR volumes of the manbook on Valentine's Day the year we got married. Honestly, he wasn't as excited about it as I imagined, but that's ok. He has enjoyed reading through the hundreds of letters throughout our marriage.  By that time, I had found the man God had prepared for me...the man I had waited. for.  God is sooo good.

Does this sound like a good idea to you?  If you're interested in starting your own man-book (which I recommend to every friend or young teenager, here are some starting tips:

1. Start small.  Don't try to write too much or say more than you really mean.

2. Make a point to pray for your husband and don't be afraid to ask for the things one may think are too "big" for God to handle - ex. his purity.  Even in this world, God can use your prayers to protect your husband from the temptations bombarding him every day.

3. Have fun! I loved going to Michael's and picking out stickers and embellishments to make journaling more creative.

4. Wait.  Don't put anybody's name in the journal.  You will know when God answers your prayers. It is tempting to have a man in your mind when you are writing, but do your best to not get carried away with emotions.  Try not to have "someone" in mind when writing...you never know what God can do in the time it takes to fill these pages!

5. Worship.  This time you spend journaling can be a very worshipful experience with the Lord. Invite Him into your heart and head as you fall in love again with the One who first stole your heart - Christ Jesus.

Enjoy! If you have any questions, feel free to message or email me :)